Long Distance Love...

So it's been awhile since I posted a written blog. I've been really fond of videos lately...and still am, but my ear is hurting quite a bit today and I am trying to get a flow of thought going so I can finish my English paper...yeah, it's due in less than six hours and I'm exactly one paragraph in.

Anyway, I have decided that long distance relationships suck. I love my boyfriend very much but we can't do things a 'normal' couple can do. We can't talk on the phone for hours or catch a movie on Friday nights or meet up after work for dinner or spend a quiet Saturday cuddled on the couch watching Netflix...you get the idea. These are all things I want.

Now, don't get me wrong. I have waited for 27 years to find a guy as wonderful as Jan and I wouldn't give him up for everything in the world. If I have to deal with the distance to have him I will, it just is incredibly sucky.

It is really hard to know there is this wonderful guy out there and to want to hold him and be held by him and not be able to.

I'm determined to get him here for a visit in November. I think he shares this determination. I keep looking toward November for solace but it seems like a lifetime away. Especially when I'm sick and the days tick by slowly as it is.

I know it seems like I'm complaining. I'm not...not really. I feel blessed to have Jan in my life. I know the kinds of guys that are out there all too well and to have found someone like him that wants me in return is more than I could have hoped for. It is hard, but worth it. I guess I'm just really venting right now. I'm not so much complaining as I am frustrated at the situation.

I really hope things with Jan last. I feel like we could be happy. I hope someday we are able to bridge this distance with more than a visit and do 'normal' couple things. It's this hope that I hang on to when I'm still alone at night thinking of him.

On that note I'm off to find other ways to put off my English paper. Thanks for reading and take care y'all.

~Cilla